Dad’s Drug Addiction

Tammy:  I know you talked about your dad having an addiction when I was talking to you.

Chris:  That was after I left home.

Tammy:  Was that cocaine or something?

Chris:  It was something like a powder; I’m not sure, I guess it was cocaine.

Tammy:  How do you think that affected you?

Chris:  I don’t think it affected me… well, it did affect me, but deep down, it didn’t really hurt as much as I thought it would. It was kind of weird. Because when my mom and my sister told me, like when they had talked to him about it, it didn’t seem to register. Like I said, he would change subject. When I talked to him about it, he would immediately change the subject because they found cuts on his CDs where he would separate and stuff like that. At a car dealership, I mean, he’d find guys that do kind of stuff all the time, I guess. But he was just coping with, I never came back home. Because before I met Shanann, and it was just…

Tammy:  Did you feel guilty that he’s using drugs because you never came back home, like he lost his kid?

Chris:  I never really knew why he was doing it. After the fact, I knew it was because he was coping with that. I never knew why he actually turned to drugs; my mom thought he was having an affair because all this money was going somewhere else, just for the drugs. Like, myself, I never used drugs. I always tried to tell him, “Hey, what’s going on? Why do you need to use this? You could [sic] this for a whole lot better things. Don’t throw your life away.” Because you could see in his face, eyes were like… everything was getting, like what drugs do to your face and his skin was getting all loose and he was losing a lot of weight. His nose was bleeding all the time and stuff like that and I’d just tell him, “Hey, you smoked every day of your like since you were like 15 or 16. You could stop that, why can’t you stop this?” He put it away, I guess, pretty quick after I talked to him about it.

Grahm/Dave:  Do you think you were closer to your dad than your mom?

Chris:  Mm-hmm. Yeah, we always went to races together and he always came to my sports, played a couple of school sports, [inaudible 02:33:01] ball, all that kind of stuff. My mom would come to it sometimes; my dad was always there. Even if I wasn’t playing, he’d just come there just in case I went in there, so that’s cool.

Tammy:  I wondered if they hadn’t visited because they weren’t ready to visit or if it was a money thing.

Chris:  Here or Colorado?

Tammy:  Yeah, you.

Chris:  Visit here?

Tammy:  Yeah, visit here.

Chris:  Well, I just told them they can’t drive in the snow.

Tammy:  These roads are bad.

Chris:  I think it’s like an hour even the Madison Airport, whichever way it is. I told them wait until springtime.

Grahm/Dave:  Good advice, it’s pretty brutal.

Tammy:  It was yesterday.

Dave:  Do they have money to get here?

Chris:  They sold my toolbox to get some money to come here. So, they’ll come out here in like, they said April, but I was like, “Maybe push until June.” They said sometimes they have a blizzard out here in April sometimes too. This lake effect stuff is crazy.