Chris’s Dad


Grahm/Dave:  One of the more poignant or tender moments in all of this was seeing you with your dad when he came in. What was it like when you picked him up at the airport?

Chris:  It was very strange. It was kind of like I almost knew this was probably the last time I’d ever see him on the outside – in my head, I knew that.

Grahm/Dave:  What did you guys talk about?

Chris:  Honestly, he just wanted to talk about sports. He always distances himself from a problem. Like if there was ever an issue or anything like that, he always wanted to just bring up – like when I would try to get him to quit smoking all the time, this was after I just graduated high school.

Tammy:  Are you talking about cigarettes?

Chris:  Yeah. He would always change the subject. Like, “Did hear what happened in [inaudible 01:54:38] football? He’d say, “Oh, yeah. I’d get to it.” And just, boom, something else. I just kind of felt like it was kind of like that. He maybe asked a few questions, like, “Do you know where they’re at? Do you think you know where they’re at?” I told him, “No.” And then, he just wanted to talk about sports and just normal things and just kind of – I’m not sure if he maybe knew anything, maybe he kind of figured out something maybe happened and just wanted to talk to me as a son.

Grahm/Dave:  Is it possible that he saw that you were in a stressful situation and wanted to do what he always did? Make things comfortable.

Chris:  Yeah. I think that was a good way to put it.

Grahm/Dave:  I think you picked up a lot of that from him.

Chris:  Yeah, because in stressful situations, I mean, the gray hair doesn’t show it, but I try not to be in stress. You know, I worked on cars – there’s a lot of stress because it’s always, it’s on commission, you get paid by what you do, not by you showing up. You know, at [where he worked 01:55:49], it was a little less stressful. Because I got paid just to be there.

Tammy:  Was your dad’s marriage like yours and Shanann’s marriage? Like your dad was the more passive one and your mom is the more dominant.

Chris:  Yeah, my mom was always the more aggressive one.

Tammy:  Was she like Shanann in a way? I mean, were you attracted to Shanann because she was kind of like how your mom and dad’s relationship was?

Chris:  It almost mirrored her mom and dad’s relationship, honestly, because her dad is like my dad. They’re both kind of calm, cool, collected and her mom is very…

Grahm/Dave:  Sandy rules that roost.

Chris:  Oh yeah. Yeah, very. I kind of related it to that. Her mom always said like, she always told Shanann that she would marry somebody that was kind of like her dad and I felt like I was kind of like her dad. I mean, I couldn’t build a lot of things he could, but our personalities were kind of like, you know – I think he really liked me the first time he met me because I was helping Shanann with this – she had gotten this car from the dealership that she worked at and she was driving it around and it felt like wheels might fall off. And I pulled over where her dad was and I was like, I got underneath it and jacked it up and I was like, you know, trying to fix everything and he was saying like, “Any other guy she ever dated would have stood by and watched me do it.” So, I think that’s when she really kind of liked me. I was always the one to help people, not to hurt anybody.